During last year’s 4 month lockdown I realised there were a couple of friends in my life who I felt really drained by after we caught up. I would...
What to do about a friendship that is draining you
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Blog posts on: Friendships
The video from Bloody Good Bloke that made me cry
A few weeks ago Bloody Good Bloke sent me a video he’d made that made me burst into tears. The video was of his Nona and Dida — his Croatian...
How to have a difficult conversation with your mate
On Sunday I had an accidentally awkward conversation with a friend that ended really weirdly as she dropped me home. I love this friend, but over...
What to do if you struggle to ask for favours
In highschool there was a beautiful girl who I didn’t know well who always seemed to be the star of the show. I felt she was cocky, and I resented...
What to do if you feel guilty when people do nice things for you
Two nights ago Bloody Good Bloke fell asleep early while I was still unpacking our stuff in our new place near Byron Bay. I worked for a few hours...
How long should you take to get over your ex?
This morning Bloody Good Bloke texted me to find out how my catch up with Bloody Good Chap had gone. “I only cried all the way home this time, not...
How to stop yourself from spiralling into a 2 day pass-ag tantrum at your partner
Yesterday Bloody Good Bloke jumped into the driver's seat of my car with very wet, salty togs on. I (mildly) snapped at him. He (mildly) snapped...
An unexpected knock at my door
Last week New Secret Man and I were in the kitchen, cooking and dancing to Dreadlock Holiday (me dancing, NSM cooking) when we heard an unexpected...
Breaking up with friends who drain you (again)
In the past few months I’ve made the challenging decision (again) to break up with a friend or two. At the start of Covid I became really...
What to do when both you and your mate throw your toys out of the cot, and both of you are too stubborn to reconvene
This morning my friend sent me a text that was so passive aggressive that Neville immediately announced "Well fuck him, dismissive prick, we’re done...
How to stop buggering up our friendships with insecurities
I had a friend who I treated very badly because of my insecurity. I’ll call her Jess. I was seethingly envious of Jess. I was certain she wasn’t...
How to handle competition and envy in female friendships
In the last few weeks, a friend of mine has completely shifted the way I think about the subtle jealousy and competition that lurks around in the...
How to make more authentic friendships
A week ago, sitting with a glass of wine in a little cobbled laneway in southern Spain with two women I’d only ever spent a couple of hours with in...
Overzealous conversation-fairness alarms & chatty cathys
Yesterday I hung out with a friend who loves to talk. We hung out, she talked, I listened. Slowly my listening turned to sort-of-listening. Then...
How to let go of resentment
Yesterday I bluntly asked my close friend when he paused for breath “Hey, how come you rarely ask me any questions? Are you aware that over the last...
How to make better friendships, even when you suck at them a bit
On a Sunday I found myself lying in the dark crying completely unexpected tears as I relayed my thought process to a friend. I was away with a group...
How to be less socially awkward and stop being side-slapped by unexpected emotions
Recently in an EMDR session with a psychologist, she asked me to write down the 10 worst experiences in my life. Rainbows and butterflies ensued. Of...
A deceptively simple trick for when your mind grabs the self loathing stick
Last night as I got half way down the street from dropping a friend at her house, I noticed that there was a war of hatred going on in my head....
Looking for anything in particular?
I have an online workshop coming up (details TBC) called How to be Less of a Dick to Yourself (AKA Self Compassion for Sceptics)! I would love you to join us — It’s going to be bloody splendid! Click here to register your interest.
How to stop a bad day in its tracks
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