How to be more interesting than the average Tinder user

How to be more interesting than the average Tinder user

Image credit: my Tinder profile

Tinder should run courses on not being boring.

The number of ‘Hi, how are you’s’ is mind-numbing. If you use Tinder and you write “Hi, how are you”, PLEASE, for the love of god, stop!

I decided to take matters in my own hands when I was on Tinder and was usually first off the bat to start conversations with something a bit odd.

Because anyone who isn’t open to non-bland conversations was never going to make the cut, may as well weed them out from the get go.

I found that “broccoli or green beans?” elicited some great conversations about vegetables. (I was studying nutrition at the time)

I also experimented with questions about power tools

(I was genuinely interested as I’d just bought myself a circular saw), but that inevitably elicited some fairly predictable responses.

I also found that being super direct –

“Sex or dating?”

resulted in the most interesting conversations I’ve ever had on Tinder. All the most jock-ish of boys I sent it to launched into full conversations about how they’re open to sex but actually looking for something more. I thought they were taking the piss, but they seemed very sincere. I suppose I’ll never know!

I actually don’t know how the Tinder conversation started with Bloody Good Chap, because he deleted his Tinder account a couple of weeks after we met.

What a modern day romantic!

I was annoyed because I wanted to go back and laugh at it. And screen shot it to show our grandchildren, etc. Steady on eh? But seriously, will our generation be sharing Tinder screenshots with our grandchildren?

Something else that flips my wicket –

people who say ‘Hi, how are you’ as they’re walking past you.

Invariably the only option is to shout, ‘good, how are you!’ over your shoulder. To which they respond ‘good’, and you’re both left baffled by the pointlessness of the exchange.

Boring, etiquette driven conversations also get my goat.

Like, Hi, I’m Boris. Sooo.. what do you do? Usually followed by glazed eyes and a few back-and-forth questions designed to allow you both to retreat into your own thoughts while scanning your peripheral vision for more interesting people.

Unless someone says “sex”.

Which I often do.

Anyway. The point is, if you ask boring questions, you should expect a boring answer.

So, I’ve compiled a very short list of alternative conversation starters so you’ll never again say the dreaded “Sooo, what do you do?”

  1. What was the BEST thing that happened to you today?
  2. Where would you live if you didn’t live here?
  3. How busy is your mind today?
  4. What do you think about the whole paleo/ vegan thing? (Watch out for cross-fitters and actual vegans though – ranty territory)
  5. What’s something you’ve never done that you’d love to do?
  6. Favourite icecream flavour?
  7. What do you love about your job?
  8. What would you do if you didn’t do the job you do?
  9. What does your ideal day look like?
  10. How do you feel about owning chickens?

Alternatively, check out this much-better list of 100 interesting conversation starters by one of my favourite copywriters.

Comments

comments

  • Including Cake

    This made me laugh… love it!! I soooo hear you, I hate the boring ‘how are you’s’ it makes me hit delete immediately. It actually puts me off making the effort to meet people because I cringe at the boringness of what will likely come. I hate boringness over bad grammar too (though that is a close second!) Plenty Of Fish is just as bad as Tinder.

    I need to follow your lead be more random, I don’t think i’m quite random enough yet though I do often start with “what’s the most random thing that would surprise me to know about you”. Thanks for the push to put myself back out there. xx

    • Glad to hear it!! “Tell me something interesting” also gets good results – my now boyfriend has just reminded me that that’s the line I used on him! He told me he’d recently been to a yoga/ martial arts retreat on an army base in the Philippines, just because he likes trying things new – he was in from the get go!

      Let me know how you get on being more random, I hope you get some decent responses!

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Gidday, I'm Andrea

I'm a mindfulness advisor and former cynical pessimist.

I used to be an awkward, pessimistic, mediocrely happy overachiever.

Life looked good on the outside, but on the inside things were average.

I was indecisive, I didn't know what to do with my life, I self-sabotaged the hell out of my relationships.

I had a feeling I was going to keep f-ing things up for myself unless something radical changed.

The life handbrake-turn that followed over the next few years came as the result of learning what I now teach in Bloody Good Life 101. Just practical, relatable techniques without any rainbow and butterfly jibber jabber.

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