This morning I found myself biking behind a chick who was dressed like a legend. Awesome pencil stripe skirt, denim shirt tucked in at the waist, chunky clog heel things. I sped up my bike to further investigate her style. Then, as I passed her (her giant chunky clogs were impeding her speed and I was late for a meeting) I impulsively thought “tell her she’s beautiful!!”. As I biked past her, I said instead “I love your skirt!”.
In hindsight that probably sounded more creepy than telling her she looked beautiful.
A few hours later in the day, a friend introduced me to her business partner, and as the business partner swivelled to look at me, no makeup and short dark hair, my mind said “Wow, what a beautiful girl! Tell her!” Neville is apparently feeling very complimentary today.
Normally I’m not brave enough to follow through on those “tell her” thoughts,
but since I was already on a roll, I suddenly announced as I shook her hand “Hi, I’m Andrea. You’re very beautiful!”
She laughed and said she doesn’t think anyone had ever said that to her before. Then we had a chat about saying out loud what your mind actually thinks, and how she’d once told a girl she was beautiful and the girl got all stressed about it because she was so unfamiliar with receiving compliments.
While in Mexico, a really beautiful, powerful woman who I’d been admiring from afar sat next to me in one of the workshops we were at, and said,
“I just wanted to tell you that you’re really stunning, I just keep looking at you and being struck by how beautiful you are.”
Later that night when I looked in the mirror I found that despite having felt insecure about my ridiculous humidity-hair and pasty face earlier in the day, I now looked at myself in the mirror and actually felt more beautiful.
Bloody Good Chap tells me I’m beautiful still from time to time, but I don’t tend to believe him as much because love is blind and all that. Somehow the compliment from a woman had an especially a powerful impact on my self esteem.
It continued for the week, every time I looked in the mirror, instead of focussing on my wrinkles or pale features, I felt like I saw more what she saw.
It struck me so much I thanked her again a few days ago and vowed to myself that I’d make more of an effort to compliment women when the thought struck me.
Then I forgot about it for a month. Until today.
Seeing the faces of the women crinkle up in a grin as they were complimented left me grinning (mostly internally). Being complimented by another woman made my day. My week even.
Compliment your fellow amazing females!
If you think a nice thought, announce it!
Our thoughts are so geared for bullshit worries,
we need to big up the bright shiny thoughts that occasionally break through the clouds and put them to work in the world!
Let’s make it a challenge. Today, give a random female a spontaneous compliment. Then if it feels good, do it again tomorrow.
I’d love you to let me know how you get on!
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