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How to stay motivated to do what we need to do to be where we want to be

Making Decisions & Finding Passion

Today I had a weird realisation. I speak French – but I’ve only ever bothered to learn enough to make people think I’m nearly-fluent.

But I’m not. Not even close.

I say I love speaking French. But what I really love is people being impressed by the fact that I sound like I speak fluent French.

Merci beau cul. Uhhhh, I mean beaucoup. (Did you know if you just slightly fuck that sentence up with your accent, instead of saying “thanks very much”, you say “thanks, nice ass.”

It’s a pattern in all areas of my life – I’m a high achiever, yet I constantly find myself doing just enough to prove to others that I’m awesome, but never any extra. I know I could be better at speaking French, and everything I do, for that matter.

We all do.

Most of us stop before total mastery, our interest tails off once we’ve reached “enough”.

Enough usually is measured against other’s opinions of us, not our full capacity.

Which means we’re constantly limiting ourselves to mediocrity.

In most areas of my life I know that my potential is a lot higher than what I achieve, but I tend to play it small at the same time as doing enough to make people think that I’m playing it large.

Most of us go through our whole life with our potential fully intact – it remains a ‘potential’ rather than a reality.

Last week, Natalie Sisson asked me if I’m interested in hiring a new biz coach, and I found myself writing: “I’ve been told my business has the potential to skyrocket (not my words), but I don’t know how to get to the moon yet (it seems scary up there). I’m definitely keen to get the right support along the way so I don’t freak out and turn back!”

(Argh, my travelling digital nomad idol is now my business mentor!! Wooohooo!! This is Natalie here. We drank champagne. If you haven’t heard of her, get to it).

Because I know, as well as anyone who is aiming for the moon in their particular area of life – elite sports players, top entrepreneurs, CEOs, super Mums, top table tennis players – that we can’t hope to do it alone.

It’s not how humans work.

When travelling an unknown road alone, we’ll frequently have moments where we freak out and want to turn back.

And many more moments where we’ll lose all motivation and choose Offspring reruns over progress. (Ps – Aussies – is Offspring come back or what?!)

Those are the moments where we need a coach or mentor or unbiased friend there to support us and remind us not to listen to our freaking-out/ demotivated mind.

I know what it will take to make my business skyrocket even more, but it scares me. So I waste months checking emails and doing menial things instead.

As humans we’re wired to run from pain before we run towards pleasure. So though we might love how we feel when we excel in life, our brain and body is a survival machine, and unless there’s pain (i.e. a fire under our ass), we are unlikely to be able to muster the energy to overcome the resistance to achieve what we want to achieve.

This is why coaches, PTs, trainers, and hard ass bosses exist.

We all think if we ran our own lives we’d get so much done. But really we’d just sit around eating Zebra Dream Latte coconut ice cream, probably. Not gonna lie, I just ate some. Sugar free diet = failing.

We can’t always motivate ourselves, because sometimes getting the moon requires a lot of rocket fuel, and the mind and body worries we’ll run out. So it clamps down on the supplies and suddenly you just. can’t. be. arsed.

So how do we get around this shemozle?

Well hell, if I knew, I’d be on the moon.

But here’s my theory:

Do you reckon the All Blacks wake up every day fresh and raring to train? Every single day? Maybe some days, for sure, maybe even most, but not every day. No one’s body and mind is 100% motivated every day. Even gazelles take naps. I’m pretty sure.

So what do they do? (The All Blacks, not the gazelles). They get a coach. Many coaches even. And they put themselves in a position where they have no choice but to step up.

This is why I hired Natalie Sisson as my new biz coach.

And why you should hire a coach, if you want to step it up in any area of your life.

There are a million and one coaches for all types of people, go on a coach researching rampage!

And then pick me.

But only if you’re an over-achiever who is all good with a few swear words and some seriously honest honestly, and you’re keen to step it up Bloody Good Life style.

PS – Oh my god, we had our first Bloody Good Lifers 101 live group call today. It was bloody awesome, so many legends on one screen. There was way more honesty than you can shake a stick at, and some massive realisations that people from all walks of life can still struggle with the same shit.

Want to join us for the next round? Of course you do. Put your name on the list here to get notificationised when i’m next running it. You’ll know about it as soon as I do :D

Ps — To learn more about regulating your emotions like the kind of legend that doesn’t throw coke at me, head over here to check out Bloody Good Life, an unconventional mind-taming program for overthinkers.

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