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How to reinvigorate your relationship

Relationships & Sex

2 days ago Bloody Good Chap and I were finally honest with each other about a few things we’ve been keeping to ourselves.

We’ve been feeling disconnected from each other – still spending lots of time together, making time for date nights, but not feeling connected and open and playful like we usually do.

Our intimacy and sex life had taken a hit as a result,

we were withdrawing from each other emotionally,

which makes good sex and intimacy almost impossible.

When this happens in our relationship, which it does from time to time after 4 years together (woohoo, a PB for both of us!), we fall back on a technique we learnt in one of Kim Anami’s sex & relationship courses (I can’t remember which one, we’ve done them all!)

Project Self - Andrea Featherstone - Bloody Good Life 101 - Mindfulness - Life Coaching - blog post

In between every relationship, it’s like we have a pane of glass between us.

When the glass is clear, we can fully see and understand and connect with each other, and intimacy and sex feels light and fun and effortless.

But when something goes wrong between us, even a tiny little thing that bothered one of us, it puts a fleck of dirt on the glass.

Then another little thing irks one of us… another fleck of dirt on the glass.

Over time, without addressing these issues, the dirt builds up and up, to the point that

we’re hanging out, but not really seeing each other – disconnected, withdrawn.

A bit numb, both emotionally and sexually.

So we have a regular practice in our relationship: “glass clearing”.

Eventually one of us will ask –

“do we need to do some glass clearing?”

2 days ago BGC and I both opened up about some small and some big things we’ve been mulling over in our heads without being honest with each other.

It was a hard conversation, there were tears, and there was pain and raw honesty.

But with every bit of honesty and every tear, the glass started to become transparent again. For the first time in a couple of months, I could properly see him again, and I felt like he could see me.

When the storm settled, we were more connected than we’ve ever been, more drawn to each other, and our intimacy kicked back into gear with ease.

Project Self - Andrea Featherstone - Bloody Good Life 101 - Mindfulness - Life Coaching - blog post

This morning I couldn’t wait for him to wake up after my early morning Bloody Good Life group call so I could jump up into his arms and kiss him.

I can’t thank Kim Anami enough for the incredible techniques BGC and I have learnt from her sex & relationship courses.

It’s not about learning special sexual techniques (though Kim will teach you plenty of those too) –

it’s about understanding yourself, understanding your partner, communicating, breaking down barriers, clearing the glass, and meeting each other in the middle.

That’s what creates explosive sex and super connected intimacy, even in a long term relationship where things have become a bit rote.

If you’re keen to open up and energise yourself, your libido and your relationships (whether you’re single or with a partnership), I can’t recommend Kim’s Vaginal Kung Fu course more highly.

Vaginal Kung Fu is open until MIDNIGHT TONIGHT (Friday 1st Feb 2019, PST) only, then it closes for another year. Click here to check it out!

Give it a shot, and if it doesn’t rock your world like it rocked mine, you have 30 days to get a full refund – so you can try it risk free.

(Psstt – if you sign up to Kim’s VKF program, let me know – I’ll give you access to my bonus module: Sex & Relationships – where I’ll share the incredible techniques I’ve learnt for building and sustaining an incredible, connected relationship and sex life).

Ps — To learn more about regulating your emotions like the kind of legend that doesn’t throw coke at me, head over here to check out Bloody Good Life, an unconventional mind-taming program for overthinkers.

Pstt - enjoyed this blog post? Fab. If you have a hankering for more radical honesty delivered freshly to your inbox every week or eight-ish, subscribe over here.

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